[FOOD & TOILET Stories- Africa]

Due to popular demand (well my sister really) let me describe some stomach churning stories!

*FOOD*
I cant say I have seen any dishes that would really astound you, unlike the Chinese (wait for my travels then) but the food preparation is another story. One of my favourite scenes was in Tanzania when a man had 2 chickens tied together by the feet and losely placed on the back of the bicycle as he rode. They fell off squaking, he calmly stopped, picked them up by the feet and threw them back on the bike and continued. It was magic to see. A live chicken at the market goes for less than 1Euro and I have seen a woman in a bus with a chicken on the lap...and feeding it with some nuts...no doubt she will be re-eating those nuts again soon.

Fish and meat markets are always an experience on the senses...I have seen a fish market in Tanzania where the floor was black with slime from countless years of fish, and a man was rolling an octupus in this very slime to tenderise it. He gleefully offered to sell it to me..."thanks, but I have just given up on fish as it happens!" The stench was overpowering with a pleasant 30 degrees and high humidity.

I once made the mistake to eat in a local restraunt, again in Tanzania, which had no fridge or 'real' kitchen. I tried some tuna fish with rice, for just 50 cents euro, even though I had already seen the local fish market. If the locals eat so can I, I figure. About a week later I had the longest night of my life! refer to entry dated-March 29, 2003 [MOSHI, Tanzania]


Seeing butchers hanging their carcasses in the full sun of a 45 degree day in Egypt just proves my theory that we really are meant to be vegetarians!

*TOILETS*
I use to be a bit selective about where I 'download' but Africa has taught me to be otherwise. Firstly, most toilets in Africa are of the french or indian style- porcelain basin, hollow shaped, a hole at the back and panels on the side where one is to squat. Toilet paper is not used and a bucket of water or a water hose is used for the cleansing. This after a while becomes quite exceptable and surprisingly the toilets are generally cleaner than the sit down toilets, generally...

My favourite war stories are the drop toilets in the Serengeti National Park...the flies almosted carried me away from the toilet hole as I opened the door, as did the smell! Once on the border of the Kenyan and Tanzania border I had stomach problems and nature was calling hard...another stinky drop toilet with no water at hand, and all I had was 2 tissue papers....had to be economical then.

But as the southern toilets are stinky are the Egyptian toilets bizarre. Sit down toilets but toilet paper is still not used. Typically they have a water pipe that comes into the bowl and then faces up for the squirt...the idea is to turn the water on as one is finished and give oneself a flush. Two problems come with this. Firstly if there is a download involved, it can stick to the side of the pipe and this doesnt get flushed by the toilet but even worse is is that some excrement can get caught on the opening of the pipe and when one turns on the water shit literally flies! Then there is the gentle art of positionings ones arse over the water stream in order to get a wash without trying to flood the floor or wet the pants.

And the winner of the smellest toilet goes to the Egyptian train....if the carriage door was left open the rank smell would waffle in, it smelt worse than a colony of seals, and for those of you who havent had the pleausure to smell this, imagine an acrid, strong and permeating smell that gently burns your nostrils and forces your stomach contents hurling upwards.

here endiths my stories.


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